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Cookie's passing

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Post by kobikiki Thu Feb 18, 2016 8:36 pm

I'm sorry I haven't been here for a while, I feel so lost at the moment.
My little girl Cookie started seeming poorly Last week, she wasn't sitting down properly so as her vaccinations were due I took her to the vet and mentioned my concerns. The vet put it down to possible arthritis and prescribed metacam. She wasn't the easiest rabbit to give meds to but we tempted her by mixing in with some tasty veg.
She started to act out of character yesterday as she wasn't interested in her food and she usually runs circles when she hears the bag. I managed to get her an appointment and a different vet noticed that her vagina was swollen, i can't believe I hadn't noticed how bad it was until then and that the previous vet hadn't picked up on it. We were given liquid recovery, baytril and Metaclopramide. She took her temp and it was really high I can't remember the figure now, her heart was also beating very quick which is usually normal for us at the vets.
The vet suggested separating her and Kobi so we can check she was going to the toilet and eating. They have a room to themselves and a seperate hall so we gave her the hall and set her up with a litter try and bowls and put some towels down. She did go straight over to her food and attempted a couple of bites but she wasn't really chewing.
I gave her the medicines and she reluctantly took them, then tried the recovery but she was just holding it in her mouth. I felt awful putting her through so much stress and she started getting frustrated and nipping so after having about half of the mixture. we let her go in the hope that what she did take would at least be something.

I couldn't sleep properly so I woke up this morning and checked on my fur baby to see how she was doing. She hadn't eaten, no poops but she had urinated just not in the litter tray. The urine was more of an orangey yellow. She was also breathing heavily and making what I can only describe as a popping sound. She's always breathed with a bit of a snore when she was asleep but this was much louder. I tried a bit more of the recovery but she just wasn't moving her mouth. My usual sassy bunny had become very lethargic and let me lift her head and touch her chin which she normally doesn't like. I waited till 8.30 To call the vet and got a 9.20 appointment. She let me lift her into her carrier when normally this takes a few tries.

When we placed her on the table she was sitting, then gradually she was laying flat out on the table, her breathing slowed right down and her eyes half shut Sad she took her temp and I think she said it was very low at 80. The vet said the kindest thing to do would be to put her to sleep as she was very poorly and would only prolong the suffering by hospitalising her. I couldn't bare to see her like that on the table so agreed. I said my goodbyes and gave her kiss and she was taken away. My poor little baby who has been through so much in her little life with numerous eye problems and going blind in one of them, I just can't handle the pain of losing her.

I was constantly researching on how I can make their time in this world better and I feel like a failure for not picking up on her problems sooner.

As we are moving soon we have requested for her to be cremated but only since I came home I have read that I should have bought her body back for our other rabbit to accept her death and understand what has happened. After worrying all day I phoned them to ask if it would now be possible to bring her home but of course she has now been in cold storage so it would not be the same.

My other rabbit Kobi seems okay at the moment, we did leave a towel she had been laying on out and he was licking it and then did a binky, so part of me is hoping he could sense she was unwell? We did let him in to see her this morning, he gave her a kiss but then was more interested in the food she left. I just don't want him to be lonely or become depressed after waiting for her to come home. Is it best to see how he copes or introduce a new companion in trine? I just feel awful at the thought of 'replacing' her but I don't want him to become miserable without a mate.

I'm really sorry for such a long post and for waffling, hopefully this is okay to post here. I'm just so lost right now and have cried all day. Constant guilt and what ifs going through my mind. I know everyone here understands how much our furry friends mean to us.

My heart is truley broken and i feel so empty. I'm really going to miss you Cookie you beautiful girl, you bought so much joy into our lives and we will continue to love you so very muchxxxx
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Post by gemma997 Thu Feb 18, 2016 9:14 pm

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss
Our thoughts are with you at this sad time

Xxx
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Post by Thumper2001 Thu Feb 18, 2016 9:43 pm

Aw I am sorry to hear about Cookie Hugs They really do break your heart.

Try not to beat yourself up about the way it happened. Rabbits are so very good at hiding illness that it is sometimes too late for them before it becomes obvious they are unwell. And they can go downhill very quickly!

Also don't beat yourself up about Kobi not getting to see her. There's nothing you can do about that now so beating yourself up will do no good Thumbs Up

Re getting him a new partner, I think only you can make that judgement call. He's your bun, you know him better than anyone. Maybe see how he copes over the next few days and take it from there? I've never been in that position before but I reckon he'll let you know.

Sorry again for your loss Hugs
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Post by c.bolduan Thu Feb 18, 2016 9:52 pm

So sorry to hear of your loss and her passing.
Thumper is right. They hide things so successfully.
Just sad and there is nothing anyone can say or do to ease the pain right now, I'm sending you the biggest hug I can muster.
Binkey free little cookie.

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Post by iiisecondcreep Fri Feb 19, 2016 8:01 am

RIP Cookie xxx
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Post by jolovesbunnies Fri Feb 19, 2016 7:04 pm

I am so very sorry darling, I wish I could give you a big cuddle. Hugs

Hugs
Jo xx

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Post by JoeyBunsMum Fri Feb 19, 2016 8:46 pm

I'm so sorry to read about Cookie Crying or Very sad I loved seeing your photos and reading what they had been up to.

Please try not to beat yourself up (easier said than done, I know) it's natural to blame yourself and go over every last detail. You did everything you could and a damn sight more than a lot of people I'm sure.

Maybe best see how Kobi gets on for a few weeks and take it from there.

Hugs Hugs

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Post by woodwench Fri Feb 19, 2016 9:47 pm

I agree with Thumper.
You shouldn't reproach yourself. Rabbits are expert at hiding their ills. And Kobi will let you know whether or not he is wanting a mate. If he does appear to want a new companion then I think you will recognise his need.

RIP Cookie, enjoy the land of rainbows.
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Post by kobikiki Fri Feb 19, 2016 10:40 pm

Thank you all for your condolences, it's been hard today and I keep checking on Kobi to see how he's doing, I think he's actually coping better than me. He's still eating, drinking and investigating some of the new boxes I've given him to keep him occupied. Hopefully the vets will still let me know what comes out from the swab tests they did so I know what happened to her. I still can't believe she's gone, missing her very much xx
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Post by jolovesbunnies Sat Feb 20, 2016 11:15 pm

I am dreading losing Holly more than anything else love so I know how you are feeling.  Top up comfort vibes are on their way. Hugs

Hugs
Jo xx

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Post by kobikiki Thu Feb 25, 2016 5:25 pm

Just wanted to send an update, we called the vets today as we hadn't heard back regarding the swab tests, I know it doesn't change anything but we still had paid for that to be done and wanted to know the results in case it would have been anything that would pass on to Kobi.

They have told us it was a bacterial infection and the Baytril that we had would have worked to fight it. Unfortunately we only had the chance to use it the once. I feel like I'm still none the wiser really, we kind of guessed it was going to be an infection. No mention of what may have caused the infection.

I just feel so frustrated that the week before when I raised my concerns with a different vet that this wasn't picked up on and I feel like if it had then she may still be with us as she was obviously just getting worse throughout the week Sad

Is it something I should bring up with them or just leave it? It's not going to change anything now I guess.

I feel scared to go to them now in case we get another wrong diagnosis in the future with our other bunny or dog. It's disappointing because they know how much we care about our animals and would do anything for them, from what they've said it doesn't seem like they get very many bunny owners in their practice who would go to the same lengths that we have in the past.

Crying or Very sad
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Post by KatieB Thu Feb 25, 2016 6:39 pm

Im so sorry to hear of your loss hunni.

Things like this with Buns are very difficult to diagnose, especially if yours is a practice that doesn't see many buns.

Its maybe worth a chat with them though when you are feeling stronger so that they are more alert for other bunnies.

Cant advise you what to do re the future hunni but you do need to feel confident in your vets really. Where about in the country are you hun?
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Post by jolovesbunnies Thu Feb 25, 2016 9:18 pm

I am so very sorry to hear this darling, I a sending lots of loving vibes. Hugs

I agree you have to have faith in your vet so please let us know what you decide.

Lots of loves
Jo xxxx

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Post by freecycle_rabbit Fri Feb 26, 2016 8:15 pm

RIP and binky free Cookie Hugs
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Post by woodwench Sat Feb 27, 2016 12:19 am

You have a right to know the full details of what the infection was. Your vet should tell you this even if it is not something likely to hurt Kobi... you need to know for your own peace of mind.
And for the future...? I would check around for another vet if you can't give this practice your full confidence. I have been in a similar position to you and I found another vet....
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